It's been 2 weeks since the guard, and I'm ready to try and find a replacement. My girlfriend talks me into going to the bar with her after work one day. It was a long day, I look like shit, but I decide to go anyway. A few drinks sounded pretty good right about then. We get there and she's with a bunch of her co-workers. After an hour of listening to office gossip I have no clue about I decide to mingle. I stand up and look over the crowd. There, by the bar... a promising prospect. I tuck my lighter in my pocket and walk over to the bar. I ask him for a lighter and we get to talking. Two hours later we've covered everything from music to sex, of course. Always leads to sex. We exchange numbers and he walks me to my truck. I think I've found my next fuck buddy!
Over the next couple of days we talk and text each other throughout the day. I'm really digging this guy. I'm not looking for a boyfriend, but he'd make a great friend. Plus, our texts are getting a bit heated. From the way he talks, I know he's going to be good in bed. Why would someone promise such things if they knew they couldn't deliver. He seems to be into the same things I am. I've got all these ideas and fantasies I want to try, things I haven't been able to try. He seems more than willing, and I'm stoked to get started.
He's at work and we're texting. He doesn't get off until 8, so I'm helping pass the time. Somehow the subject of him coming over comes up. He wants to have a sleepover. I'm not ready for sex yet. I know he's just a fuck buddy, and we're going to do it anyway, but it's engraved into me to hold out. We've only been talking for a week. I know I gave it up to the guard on the first night... but look how well that turned out! So, I explain to him he can come hang out, but I'm not ready for anything more. He agrees and I make a mad dash to take a shower. I stand in the shower for a good 5 minutes thinking if I should shave or not. I want to be prepared just in case, but I know if I don't shave I won't be getting frisky. It's a fail safe. Right then, no shaving. I'll shave my legs, but I'm not shaving my lady parts. He doesn't get to see it.
He comes over and we lay in bed and watch a movie. I have to work the next morning, and it's really late by the time the movie is up, so he just stays the night. Lol, our first 'date' is in my bed and he's spending the night. Not exactly standard, but this isn't your standard relationship. He's a cuddler... great. I love to cuddle! But, when I'm sleeping I need my space. I can't sleep with someone all over me. After 30 min of some serious spooning I've got to let him know I can't sleep like that!
I wake up to my alarm, and he leaves while I get ready for work. Not a bad night. I can have fun with this guy and I know the sex is going to be great. He's talked himself up so much it's gotta be good. 3 more nights go on like this. Him coming over after work, cuddles, sleep. The weekend rolls around and I'm going to his house. We both know this is the night. I'm excited and nervous as I drive over there. We hang out for a bit before going to bed. We haven't even kissed! I know it's weird that he's stayed at my house without us kissing. That was more of a companionship thing. So, we lay down and start getting to the good stuff. He comes over to kiss me and I just know this is going to be amazing. Except it's not. I can't even describe what was wrong with the kiss. It was just... off. It was sporadic and his tongue was weird. That's all I can think to say... it was like he was tightening it up as much as he could and trying to sword fight with me. He lays me down and gets my clothes off. He kisses his way down my body to my boobs. Does his weird tongue sword thing on my nipples and starts heading south. Ahh oral sex time. You can't really fuck this up. Even if you're not that good at it... it still feels good. Turns out I was wrong. He totally misses the mark. He's down there for over 5 minutes and doesn't hit my clit once. I'm convinced he doesn't even know what one is. I think he's under the impression that he's supposed to lick around my hole.. cause that's all he's doing. Guys, you need to pay attention to body language! It's obvious this isn't working for me, and yet he still continues to go at it. I tell him in a sexy, easy way that he should move it up some. He responds with "You just lay there. I know what I'm doing" What a douche! NO, ya don't! I'm trying to give you pointers here to help you out! Overconfident ass!
I pull his head up and let him know I'm ready to do it. Then starts the complaining. He hates condoms. Like I've never heard that before. Too bad, buddy! I put it on, to try and make the whole having to wear one a little better. He enjoys that part, but once the sex starts all he does is complain about the condom. Well, complain about the condom as he fucks me like a rabbit. Finally I say, "Look, you're wearing a condom. Every time. End of story. Fuck me with it on, or go jerk off." I'm tired of hearing about it! Like I'm gonna cave because you don't like it. I'd rather not have one either, but I'd rather continue on with my clean bill of health much more. Then, he decides the condom is irritating me, so I'm not wet. No... I'm not wet because your foreplay was totally lacking and you're jackhammering me like a douche. I can only describe it as him being too excited. He's all over the place. Moving around on top of me like a fish out of water.
Finally it's over! I can't believe this. This was supposed to be amazing! It was horrible!! He asks if I came, and I said no. He needs to know. I feel like I need to show him the way. The sex was horrible, but this could be a good opportunity for me. I can pay it forward, if you will.
This is a tightrope walk now. I've got to be careful not to make him feel like it was horrible (even though it was) because he'll get defensive and shut down. And seriously, this guy needs to be open to listen. So, I start telling him what I did like and adding in a few 'but I like also like it when...' Yea, he wasn't hearing it. His response was "I'm pretty set in my ways". THAT just moved him into the friend zone.
Now I don't know what to do. I like the guy, and I like hanging out with him, but sex again is out of the question. How do you tell a guy you've slept with once that you just want to be friends... especially when that's all you were really to begin with. He texts me things like "When am I going to get to see those mammary glands again"? Who says that, I mean really?
Well, two down. The next one's gotta be it, right?
24
what a disappointment!! i hate it when that happens... er... well. it's been years since i just "dated" and fooled around. but. i'm pretty sure i hate it when that happens. lol!
some chicks have no dignity
the world keeps on spinning
the world keeps on spinning
down triangle
Then again Holley might be a rigid uncommunicative idiot, rendering that overconfident dude's skills utterly futile.
One can only hope
The guy tossing her salad...lol
Also, for the record, if your not laying in a puddle after homeboy just munched your carpet, I wouldn't even bother going any further... It's not rocket science, it's a vagina. So, unless you play D&D on the weekends, or are Wolffe, you should know how to operate one...
TIN-ed.
I never know if I'm doing it right as my partners are usually gagged.
"I like the guy, and I like hanging out with him, but sex again is out of the question. How do you tell a guy you've slept with once that you just want to be friends... especially when that's all you were really to begin with. He texts me things like "When am I going to get to see those mammary glands again"? Who says that, I mean really?"
you anwsered your own question
just say " i like ya as a mate but the sex was shit , and you are a total douchbag as i was looking for a fuck buddy ...and its not you , the choice si yours ..friend or fuck off and die"
you anwsered your own question
just say " i like ya as a mate but the sex was shit , and you are a total douchbag as i was looking for a fuck buddy ...and its not you , the choice si yours ..friend or fuck off and die"
this guy doesn't sound like friend material. delete his number and erase him from your memory.