After lifetimes spent playing the new shit I have a moment of introspection.
Finished mass effect 3 - that ending is a cock block. Playing skyrim but I recall just sitting down in a dungeon on a bench and not really wanting to stand up.
It is a wonderful game make no mistake - but it all just got in my face. I started to consider things from a reality stand point - bad idea. Godlike in the game - in terms of death dealing, and shout spitting - but a pattern flows and the high pro glow of great digital power gets thin.
My soul eating Daedric mace has the policy of the affair and I just do it's need. Wandering from one incredible carnage to the next as a dragon offers itself up for a wondrous conversation I consider the ripples of the water and the moons in the sky. Don't even search my kills anymore. Shouted a shopkeeper because he was a shopkeeper.
Meh, I consider the mountains - I consider the huge web of missions made among these trees, these crags and cliffs, these rivers filled with fish. How can I play this game with out playing it, I think... How can I just allow myself the moment to consider this place that is no true place - but is one for millions...
I, like many, do not live in a wondrous environment, some do - and I have - but not now - not for many, many a year. I am constrained by what in life can constrain such as I to such straits; and I do not feel bad, nor troubled greatly in the reflection of it. I used to - but years have passed and I have come to understand the true meaning of self sacrifice - without a win - just a simple glory - a simple glory indeed.
In all games one is the Hero. But I consider this a premise ancient and dated by it's use. We live and die quickly and the generations seize upon the quick fix for those big and not so big questions. The vision of death is but a visual perk and a level up, and legion see it so.
I leave off.