This Aint News

I love stereotyping people. It's just so gratifying when I can typecast a person into a pigeonhole. It vindicates my political incorrectness, and strokes my yet unsubstantiated sense of superiority. Stereotypes are like rumours. They are impossible to prove yet all contain a seed of truth.

The fat american is an all time favorite. I can see him in my minds eye. A slovenly jabba the hut enthroned on a four wheeled scooter, fat rolls melting over his gout riddled legs like pancake batter. A leviathan that serenely glides through food courts, unconcerned for the inferior bi-peds that flee in the face of his superior momentum. His is a hunger that never sleeps, never dims. He is a slave to the demands of his flesh, ever desirous of the sugar that fuels his thoughts. His shrivelled penis is a forgotten momento of a life long lost, buried under the avalanche of flesh. His body is a temple dedicated to worshipping the pantheon of fast food gods.

He sweats ketchup, and salivates corn starch. He bathes in soda, and shampoos with bacon grease.

He is the fat american.

The fat american stereotype is pretty well understood. The seed of truth behind this stereotype is backed up by reliable statistics. The phenomena is well understood by the public. The epidemic is a product of malicious FDA control, aggressive corporate advertising, and the market being dominated by inexpensive shitty food. We are all on the same page with this one. The stereotype has grounds in reality and it's roots are easily understood.

The seed of truth contained within other stereotypes are rarely so straight forward. Most stereotypes are dismissed out of hand by politically correct skeptics, and little research could be put into it without coming off as a bigot. No self respecting academic would ever try surveying black men as to whether they liked fried chicken and watermelon.

Luckily enough, I am no self respecting academic. Though I am adverse to getting beaten up, so I gave that one a miss. Women make a much more easy target, and it panders to my chauvenism. So I decided to ask myself the question: Is there any truth to the blonde bimbo stereotype? Or more scientifically, does being a blonde bombshell make you anymore likely to being an idiot?

I love women. Not all women mind you, only the hot ones. I never really notice any of the ugly girls. When a guy walks down the street, he sees hot girls everywhere. His notice will slide over ugly chicks as if they were made of teflon. A good looking girl will turn heads, while the blander breed will just blend into the concrete.

However much the feminists will cry foul, the facts are unnavoidable. Men like hot girls more than ugly ones. Men will listen to girls that are good looking, while ugly chicks are just so much white noise. Doors are opened for hot chicks, both in a metaphorical and physical sense. Hot chicks will get that job, get invited to that party, have gifts and attention lavished upon them, all because men have placed a greater intrinsic value on attractiveness. Hot chicks have the world at their fingertips, and they don't even have to work for it.

Ugly girls have to work for it. Their overwhelming lack of physical beauty means that they need to offer alternatives to gain the respect, attention and social standing within society that everyone craves. As they cannot pass as a piece of walking art, they must compensate in other areas. They have to have personality, humor and intelligence if they wish to gain any sort of standing in our male dominated society.

The blonde bimbo stereotype (or hot in general) has plenty of validity in my experience. A hot white girl may be born with a natural gift, but in doing so is deprived of the very motivation that would have compelled them to better themselves.

Maybe I'm looking at this the wrong way though. As most men will readily confess, they will give time and attention to a dumb but gorgeous girl while there is little patience found for the both dumb and ugly. So it is possible that the stereotype is purely a male construction derived from limited exposure to the dumb and ugly, rather than a female reaction to limited oppurtunity. It may even be a combination of them both.

What does TAN think?