I'm starting a monthly blog dedicated to anything that I see fit. I'm not sure what format it's going to take but hopefully they will all be based around something in kind. I will write and you will read what I have to say. Got that lemmings.
Why do you do it young man, why, why, why man. Your face offends me and you still have face to show me your face. It is quite appalling the way some people act. I must say tut tut. Creepy little man stop mumbling. Sssspeak up would you. And put your shoulders back. You are a pitiful excuse for spunk. I get it. You're not fully developed yet. Well Christ above don't let it affect you cretin. Stand up for yourself and be a man. That's it shoulders back. Have some pride man.
What is that you say. Erectile dysfunction. We all have problems child. Mine is too much hair growth on my nipples. Look at this. Look at it. LOOK at it peasant. Fuck that was sore. Would you look at that now. It's longer than I thought it would be. Look at this hair in my hand. It's only a hair but a bunch of these things make me self-conscious about my appearance on the beach. That's my disgrace. And no I don't bother with those battery powered razor contraptions. Too metro-sexual for me. Metro-sexual is that the word they use. I think it is. You see I haven't modulated my inner workings so far that I don't sometimes reflect on my appearance in accordance with proper society. I have ego yes. But I'm still the better of this world. And I will rid the pigeons of this city one day. Now eat it. Eat my nipple hair. Ok if not this one how about this one. Shit why does that hurt so much. You think I'm morbid don't you. But I know a bit about you consumer. I know your life ain't all it's cracked up to be. It ain't all hunky dory now is it friend.
Listen I like you. That's why your here. I want to modulate your inner workings. And you have the choice of what way you want to go. I can modulate you mentally or physically. How do you want it friend. Hahahaha good. Good. I prefer it that way myself. I must say your spit isn't to my taste. So please don't do it again. Now please good sir let's get to the nitty gritty of your life. I want to talk about certain things I've seen while preying upon your soul.
Last week you must remember you went to a comedy club. A young handsome white fella appeared. Quite crude even for todays standards. This young handsome white fella was a distorted shadow, a figment of Lenny Bruce's legacy. A retarded one I imagined. He thought he'd get laughs by being monstrously bitter and cynical. But he meant to be cynical. That's the point. You got what he was doing admit it, but you remained ignorant of this, as did the rest of the audience. You all knew he was trying to be cool and hip through his cynical mutterings. Those ignorant people remained ignorant. They were the true cynical ones. This handsome white fella started making various jokes about race. And yes he used the word nigger. Nigger this nigger that he went. But noone laughed. And neither did you. Then came quips about whites, Mexicans, Italians. Spics, Guineas, Goombas, Honkees and guess what. The crowd laughed and giggled. No one would've noticed but there was a tinge of awkwardness in their laughter. They laughed because it was awkward not too. You think hundreds of years of persecution is swept away quietly by your boorish cackle. You pithy little pompous fool. You blended right in with the rest of the ignorance so well. Well Mr Sir you lose a finger for that little mistake.
Oh stop your blubbering it's only the pinky. Mind if I sit and rest my legs. Look up at me. That's a boy. Now kind sir what else is on the agenda. No, nothing. Okay I've got something that may tickle your interest. You my friend are a loather of rest and contemplation aren't you. But don't be terribly afraid. I will not blame you solely for this blight on your soul. It's a sickening cancer on society as a whole that one day I will get rid of.
You know it still astonishes me the amount of people I come across that disregard their own free will. And the absolute free will that they have. Whiners cry about not being free. Well let me tell you something. Your environment is a product of yourself, not you of it. And do you know what encourages free will. Passion and work. Work gets shit done. The passion for change and difference pushes it ever onwards. And that's why I respect you. You're a business man of sorts that likes to get shit done. You have drive, passion and you're a worker. You're the opposite to those lazy whiny hippies that I detest so much. They see forth the vision where everything is laid in front of them on a silver platter. Like the world owes them a living. Well I for one say no to that vision. You owe yourself a living and only you can do anything about your life. And that's why I respect you. You have drive. But as I mentioned your drive is twisted. And your pit is full of money.
Your life is all about the benjamins isn't it. Isn't that what they call it, the benjamins. Money I'm talking about. You see I happen to believe that we gradually get into something. The more and more we creep into the hole the harder is to get out. But it's your own god damn fault for getting into that enormous pit in the first place. A morality thing it is. I must say money is quite appealing, even to me.
But I'm sorry to say you have modulated your inner workings a bit too far to the right for my liking. I know where your passion lies friend. Greed. Isn't it greed. Isn't it. Well greed is abhorent in my eyes. It infuriates me. Your putrid soul is almost palpable. You're drive for life insults me. It's worse than those bloody lazy spongers. And that my friend is why you have to get punished. Remember when you said you'd rather have your inner workings modulated through your mind rather than body. Well that's exactly what I'm going to do you. Oh but filth I never said it was going to psychological. How about this way. Ah dear don't be frightened. It'll all be over soon. God dammit this drill is noisy isn't it. Hope noone hears this or we'll both be in trouble.
Please don't judge me. I'm a humanist at heart. Really I am. I want to better society. This little act is just more one step towards quelling this awesome storm of shit that is brewing around me. Oh friend you smirk at me but I'm telling you no lie. That's it sleep sleep. Good God this is messy. Ahh there there. All over. Now that wasn't so bad was it. MMmmm I'm tired now. I think I'll sit down and have a wee nap myself. Drift off into slumber. I'll put some soothing music on to help me. I can never get to sleep without music you know. Of course you wouldn't know that now. You're in a state of decay now. You're in a state of decay and yet here I am talking to you. Mother of God. Okay bye bye now. And Cheers for a wonderul evening.